Give me LIBERTY or give me DEATH!!

As I type these words, I am locked in a power struggle of elephantine proportions. Tensions have quickly escalated and negotiations have failed utterly. Neither side is willing to make any concessions and it looks as though the battle may well continue into the next decade. 

What, you may ask, could grind the operations of a happy, well adjusted family to a screeching halt? It is simply this: Mom has finally reached her limit and is no longer willing to clean up the myriad of messes thoughtlessly made by others. No more will toys left on the floor by careless children find their way to the toy box nor dirty clothes, left lying about, magically appear in the hamper. Dishes left at the table will not make it to the sink. You hear that friends? I AM OFFICIALLY DECLARING MY INDEPENDENCE FROM TYRANNY, OPPRESSION, AND SLAVERY!!!!!!!! I am, and will remain, ON STRIKE until the following demands are met:

1. Bedrooms will be kept tidy by the occupants and beds will be made at the time they are vacated.

2. Dishes will be carried to the sink and rinsed off immediately following meals.

3. Dirty clothes will be placed directly in the proper laundry receptacle as soon as they are removed from one's person.

4. Soiled diapers will be carried to the garage trash, not left inside to smell.

5. Empty toilet paper rolls will be replaced by the individual who pulled the last bit of paper off.

Until these demands are met, ingrate family members can expect the following:

1. Suspension of television, video game, and computer rights.

2. No more delicious meals or baked goods will be prepared by mom.

3. No more Slurpee runs.

4. All playdates and park visits will be postponed indefinitely.

5. Only clothes placed in the hamper will be laundered.

Yes, friends, I have a dream. A dream where one day all who come over unannounced can be welcomed inside without embarrassment. A dream that all can walk freely throughout the house without stepping on Polly Pockets. A dream that toilet paper will flow freely to all, that none shall be left to drip-dry on the potty. I have a dream and I shall continue to dream until the day I can say, FREE AT LAST! FREE AT LAST! THANK GOD ALMIGHTY I AM FREE AT LAST!!